Friday night I was driving home from a get together with a friend, and I made the comment “I have to get up and run 8 miles tomorrow” her reply to me was “Have to, no one is making you.” My reply was “I know but I have to get to 13 miles” her reply was “Again, no one is making you do this.” One of the reasons I love my friends so much is they can be very matter of fact, they don’t let me get away with much and I respect them for this. Sometimes, though that same matter of fact honesty that I love so much stings a bit. I wont lie, I went to bed Friday night a little hurt, but no clue as to why I was being so sensitive.
I woke up Saturday morning ready for my run, Im still not committing to distance but rather time, so I set the timer for 85 minutes and started running. I like to play tricks with my long runs, I parked in a different spot at the beach and started about 1 mile before I had started last week so psychologically I wouldn’t be running quite as far as last week (even though I really was..weird I know). The 1st mile my knee was bugging me but the kinks got worked out and before I knew it I was at the pier in Hermosa Beach 4 miles into my run stopping for water and ready to turn around and head back. Yes, I love runs like that!
It was around mile 5 that the conversation from the night before with my friend started replaying in my head and I started to think about what she had said. I knew there was more to it than what my initial reaction was, and as I played the conversation over and over again it finally hit me, I didn’t sign up for this 1/2 marathon for any other reason than to prove to myself that I could do it. I wasn’t putting in the time with these long weekend runs for anyone other than me. I started asking myself if no one ever knew I was running, training, progressing, would I still be doing this? Would I still be putting my body through these workouts? Would I still push myself as hard as I do? Over and over I kept asking these questions, playing this conversation from the night before in my mind. Every answer to my questions came back YES. Then the words Integrity of Self came to me. I would do all of this because I made a commitment to ME, a commitment to run this 1/2 marathon, a commitment to become a healthier version of ME, a commitment to INSPIRE other people through my lessons and progress. I finally had worked through it and realized this is what she meant the night before (one of the reasons I love my friends, they push me to be a better ME in lots of ways).
I finished my run at 1:27:02 and 8.06 miles. I actually improved my average pace over the week before, went further in time and distance and my body felt great!
Runners World posted this picture this morning on their Facebook page and I loved it and immediately saved it for this post. Running is teaching me some pretty cool life lessons in the process of physically challenging me and getting me into better shape!
What do you like about running?
I love this post. It’s so true of you. I’m not training for a half marathon, just my first 5k, but I know exactly how you feel. I’m doing it to prove something to myself. Coming from someone who only thought of running as a means if escaping a crazy maniac, I now love the fact that I have the freedom ( and the inspiration of a friend) to prove that I can do this. Thanks Wendie.
Congrats Heather on training for your 5K its a big accomplishment! Let me know how I can help